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Information wants to be free. So does gasoline. But neither of them wants to be free half so desperately as does a Maserati. So I decided to liberate one. For what I had in mind, though, I needed a partner - a real pirate. I found him sitting at the keyboard of his iMac. "Hey!" he said, when I kicked down his door. His eyes bugged out when he saw my outfit. "What... what are...?" I waved my Luger under his nose. "No time for explanations, Matey." I hauled him downstairs and shoved him into his Hyundai. "Now drive!" When we got to the dealership, I put a red-and-white striped cap on pudgy-boy,and gave him the parrot to carry, so he'd look more the part. "What if this thing makes poo on my shirt?" he asked nervously. "What are we doing here, anyway?" "Arrrrh!" I gave the wanker a hearty slap on the back. "Ye'll do just fine, m'lad. Just follow my lead." And in we went. Once the salesmen realized we weren't a stunt, everything went smoothly - it's a wonderful thing how polite people are when you have them at gunpoint. I accepted the keys for a Maserati, and |
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